Thirteen: Five Fingers

"Hi Mom and Dad"

Well, friday's appointment went absolutely wonderful. This was much better than the previous appointment, where basically my entire blood stream was drained and I was more or less physically assaulted by one of the midwives without warning. No heartbeats, no cute pictures. But Friday's appointment- it was perfect.

First, I met Dr. Thompson, who was everything I wanted him to be based on his picture from the lobby. He wears wire-rimmed glasses and maybe has a lisp. He is the best, and I totally trust him. He politely introduced himself and then read to me my blood results, which were all fine. Then he began the ultrasound for genetic testing. Fortunately for me, this time it was with the belly and the goo (last time, not quite). As soon as he started moving the wand around on my belly, I looked up at the screen, and there it was.

1-2-3-4-5, I counted them. Five perfect little fingers on a perfect little hand. It was amazing. Truly a miracle. The little hand moved and I just knew that everything was okay. It was the most comforting feeling, I just cannot describe it. You hear about the heartbeat and how wonderful it is to hear that for the first time, but for me, it was this hand. Every time I think about seeing that little hand for the first time, I just want to cry. Because I miss the baby already, and I want to watch her all the time. I want to see that she is okay. I want to know that she is comfortable. And that she knows I'll protect her. I just want to hold that little hand.

So, after that, Dr. Thompson moved around the magic wand to show us more proof of our baby and her health. He showed us her heart and we watched it beat, which was probably the second most amazing experience so far. He showed us her brain and explained to us how "this" and "this" showed that there were no signs of spina bifida. He had trouble checking for down syndrome because she was tilting her head in the wrong direction (he even left the room at one point so that I could walk around and try to get the baby to move), but he showed us her nose (which is pointy just like Jordan's) and showed us that there was no sign of down syndrome there. All good news!

Then, as we watched the screen, he typed G-I-R-L. She is a girl! He showed us some lines on the screen which, if parallel with the body, mean that there is a 90% chance our baby is a girl, and those lines appeared pretty parallel. So, even though it looks like Baby Sorensen is a girl, on November 21 we have another sonogram, which be more definitive because I will be 20 weeks along and the sexual organs will be formed. We will be happy either way, but if she is a girl, that will give some weight to my maternal instincts because I've thought she was a girl all along.

So after that, Dr. Thompson just reviewed with us the results which were all good. What a blessing. I have been so nervous and this appointment really eased my mind some. He made us a disk with all the photos from the sonogram, as well as printed several for us.

Then we made the calls. First we called our moms. Then dads, grandma, siblings. I should probably include how when I was on the phone telling Haley, Jordan hit the car in front of us in the McDonald's drive-thru line. Priceless. No damage done, so it was all good. We told family, a few close friends, and a few of Jordan's co-workers. Being able to finally tell people was liberating (only our parents, grandma, and a couple siblings had known prior to this appointment). Not only was it great to finally tell people and share the joy with them, but also because I was/am starting to look just fat unless one is aware I am carrying a peach sized baby around in my belly. So, the news is out for the most part. I haven't made the decision to make it social media official yet, simply because it is just such a private special experience. There are many people who I want to tell who I don't see often enough, so facebook may just be the best option.

So other than that, week thirteen has been mostly typical. Nausea has decreased some, acid indigestion is still present, sleeping is difficult but better because of the Boppy(!), and still as sleepy throughout the day as usual. Had to make a sudden run to the grocery store for prune plum juice the other night, but we won't discuss such matters. On a positive note, I thought I felt a flutter that could perhaps be the baby moving the other night, but I just don't know what it would feel like yet to be sure. Mostly, things have been going well. I am excited for my first group appointment (Centering), which will be next Friday.

I really just stare at my calender all day long with a deep anticipation for all that's to come. I love this baby, and I feel very blessed to have such a wonderful husband with whom I can share these feelings and experiences. Some of these moments, while preparing to be parents, have been the most special for us as husband and wife. I am grateful that our baby will have such a loving father. I am grateful for it all.